Realm News – Volume 4, Issue 4

realmnewsbanner4-4The PaxLair Press, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – September 7, 2013 – by Ashlynn – Don’t be fooled into reading any of our competitor’s rags – the Times is still the best paper around with all the news fit for print. Guaranteed to be 100% accurate at the time of publication and free from the sort of rumour and gossip that plagues other publications.

Why do I mention this? Well the Sosarian Journalism Awards are coming up soon and the PaxLair Times is one of the nominees! You should expect no less of course as we have a highly skilled and experienced team.

Vesper Beautification Underway

20131007vesper4A long stated aim of Governor Ivy has been to create a veneer of respectability for the maligned city of Vesper and improving the overall look of the city is one way to do so.

Yesterday evening with the aid of a few Royal Officials and a large quantity of materials “sourced” from various places, a number of decorations and structures were erected throughout the city. These included additional lighting, a rather pretty white marble fountain, and somewhere for the goblins to engage in their favourite pastime.

Unfortunately construction was cut short as the Governor had to rush off due to an emergency. The officials informed us they could not continue without her approval.

Still what was built is a definite improvement if nothing else and further improvements will be made following the Royal Council meeting this week.

Town Guard Warning Regarding Graveyards

The watchman of several towns have issued warnings about increased activity amongst undead in graveyards across Sosaria. Not only are there reports of larger numbers of walking corpses but also of one particular beast which wanders the unhallowed ground.

Why we still continue to bury the dead in Britannia I do not know. I am of the opinion that funerary rites should have changed to cremation many years ago. Still the ready availability of corpses does keep the costs down for those in professions which require dead subjects for experimentation and “raw material”.

Suspected Murderer Escapes on Dolphin

20131007boom2Yes you did just read that. A man by the name of Tyrius Zool is being sought by the Royal Guard for his possible involvement in the death of one Jimmy. Volunteer Guardsman were also seeking Jimmy at one point before it was learned that he had already met a terrible end. Amongst the suspects were Jimmy’s wife and her lover, Tyrius, a man with connections to several shady organizations operating out of the Vesper area.

It was soon learned though that Zool could be found in the backwater town of Delucia and the Royal Guard were dispatched to apprehend him. Seeming to have some warning of his impending arrest, Zool fled through Delucia passage with the aid of a large number of bandits and even a few orcs.

The volunteer guard continued their pursuit however and cornered the man at Honour shrine where he had aid from a larger ally – an ogre of all things. While the guard fought the ogre Zool jumped on the back of a dolphin and fled out to sea!

Zool should be considered extremely dangerous and any who encounter him should also be wary of any company he keeps. He should not be confronted directly and instead I advise any who meet him to call for the guard.

Ozog Celebrates Birthday

20131007ozogbdayThe pungent green creature known as Ozog celebrated his… birthday at the beginning of the month, with several people from the alliance throwing a surprise party for him. Setup and celebration generally consisted of making a mess near the Pitmuck Bread Mission and then inviting him to partake in making an even bigger mess.

Despite the odor most of the attendees stayed and even brought presents which seemed to cheer him up. Even the ale barrels were rolled out for the occasion though I decided it best to avoid drinking just incase Icky attempted to poison me again with more Love-in-idleness.

How old that makes the ice-creaming loving imp now I have no idea. Perhaps 36 turnips in goblin speak. It may be something I will have to look in to.


Royal Council meeting with King Blackthorn to be held at Castle Blackthorn at 7:30pm EST on Tuesday.

Next Vesper City Auction this thursday at 8pm! Don’t miss your chance to acquire the finest collection of pilfered wares!

About Ashlynn

I play with movable type on behalf of the PaxLair Times. I sometimes move the little wooden letters around to create something resembling an article. And I come and go like the wind.
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