Public outcry has reached the desk of Mayor Ga’kuct as
citizens declare his policies on the homeless “cruel and unusual.†Ga’kuct, in
the recent week, had successfully removed the homeless from PaxLair through the
administration of his “Nub Ryph-Raph Law†and the “Clomp de Hutlezz†plan. The
resulting freedom of PaxLair from the homeless stench was met by foul ears as
the citizens heard rumors of how cruel the punishments were bestowed upon the
Homeless.
“Sure, they urinated on my walls, but I don’t feel as if
they needed to be tortured the way they were†claimed Eli, who seeks to remain
anonymous. “What the Orcs did to the homeless was horrific.â€Â
The concerned citizens of PaxLair have demanded an official
statement from Ga’kuct regarding his recent actions, and Ga’kuct has obliged
with this official statement:
Translated from
Orcish:
I have heard rumors that the homeless that the Orcs have
ejected from PaxLair were mistreated, and many were later found murdered and I
would like the Orcs’ names cleared here and now.
We [The Orcs] merely asked the homeless to never come to
PaxLair, and reminded them that their shelter was gone and shall no longer
return. Many refused our decision, and we accepted that. Many of those that
refused were later found dead, some were beat to death.
Now, many did fall upon our weapons, but these were
completely accidental deaths, and I am launching a full investigation into the
matter. I will be organizing a committee which will look into this situation,
and figure out the cause of death for every single Homeless person that has
died.
In the preliminary investigations, we believe their deaths
to be related to malnutrition and natural causes, and have found no evidence of
foul play on the Orc’s part. But regardless of this I will pressure forward,
and discover the true cause of deaths for all of the homeless.
-Ga’kuct,
Warboss of PaxLair
I, for one, find these allegations appalling, and hope those who make such outrageous claims against the very peaceful Orcs pay for their slander. |