Author:	Wizzie
Date/Time:	1/21/2003 3:58:39 PM
Subject:	The Ring that Ruined the Rogue
FELUCCA - Cookies and milk may have changed Feluccan history earlier this week. T'was but a few nights ago when the beloved jester of PaxLair, one Wizzie, was walking up to the new headquarters of the rogues with some milk and cookies to welcome his new neighbors. Augustus was seated inside, listening to the whispering words of the communication crystals positioned around his house and throughout the city. Wizzie pretended to stumble in, and Augustus started giggling. "Can you please have some respect for my eavesdropping?" he tried to ask dourly, but ended up smiling at the jester. "Um, yes!" Wizzie said, still struggling with the milk and cookie tray. Augustus got up to accept the gift, and still laughing. "Wizzie, it's so good to have you as a neighbor. Without laughter, what else is there to life?" Wizzie grinned widely, eyes glowing a bit brighter. "Hey! You have never been to my house, uh... that I know of! Wanna see?" The two men made their way to the house, and Augustus walked in, dodging this-and-that debris here-and-there, the whosi-whatsis on the floor, and removed a thinga-mabob from a chair to have a seat. "This is a delightful home, and very tidy too, for a jester!" Wizzie grinned again. "Oh, I don't sleep here! I'm far too charming to sleep in my house all alone. The ladies wouldn't have it!" he said, giggling. Augustus grinned. "You're more rogue than jester, you know. Hey, what's this?" Gus picked up a large, bejeweled ring off the cluttered table. "Huh? No! Gus, don't...!" It was too late. The rogue had already slipped it on his finger. The ring immediately shrunk to fit, and then abruptly disappeared. "Ack, no...!" Wizzie exclaimed in mixed despair and shock. The eyes of Augustus of were squeezed tight, and he seemed to be in extraordinary pain. His red hat flattened against his head, and then rearranged itself. After several seconds of this, there was a shimmering burst of light and a dazzling array of colors. Augustus opened his eyes -- the same as before -- except he now wore a jester hat. "Oh Gus! Oh not the ring! Are you okay? Talk to me Gus!" Wizzie's expression was full of concern and had a hint of hopefullness. Augustus stared forward at the jester a moment, and then a slow smile crept over the rogue's face. "Oh Wizzie, don't weep and whine! I assure you I am fine!" Wizzie simply deflated. His shoulders sunk, his head drooped down and he regarded the floor, muttering, " ... stupid ... ring... Invite a rogue of course... idiot!" He slumped against the wall and tugged on his jester hat's bells. "Stupid ring! Oh I knew I shoulda put that up!" "Little man, what do you say? I can't hear when you talk that way!" Wizzie looked up. The glow of his eyes dimmed in thoughfulness and changed to a melancholy hue, and he was serious for a rare moment in his charmed life. "Gus, it's all my fault. I invited you in and forgot to put away the Ruinous Ruby Ring of Rhyming Rhythm. It bears a curse with no cure! The rogue lord of Army of Thieves will now rhyme every non-magical sentence until the end of his days."